How Do You Find Your Primary Aim?

How Do you find your Primary Aim? I built a business from scratch, worked in it for twelve years, made a lot of money - but, I was not happy. Something was missing and is still missing in my life. I am old enough to realize that life is finite - there is an end. And, as the clock ticks, I am troubled that I can't answer Michael's questions, e.g. "What kind of life do I want? What do I want my life to look like? Who do I wish to be?" Has anyone else struggled with finding their primary aim?

Comments:

I have been in business for almost 20 years, and I have struggled through the whole thing! It is absolutely amazing I have survived. There has been times I made enough money to take my wife to Europe for a couple of fantastic weeks, and times when i lost 20 pounds of weight in just a few weeks because of the unbelievable stress I allowed myself to get under.

I have no clue what my primary aim is or should be. I was so confused the first time I read the book I gave up for a year and just kept plodding along in my business. The only thing I can think of is "make a ton of money." I gues what I really want is freedom. I am happiest when I am creating things or figuring out how to overcome obstacles. The greater the challenge the more excited I get.

Anyway, this time I am not giving up. I will figure out what my primary aim is, and it won't be "make a ton of money!"

Thomas,

You are on the right track, and the process can be quite difficult. Try to keep in mind that your Primary Aim is not something you do or achieve, but a state of being that allows you to achieve great things.

The actual Primary Aim statement is a short, concise description of that state of being, which you can reference as a benchmark when you are at your best and when you are not quite where you need to be.

Let us know when you have a draft and I would be happy to provide some additional feedback.

Anyway, this time I am not giving up. I will figure out what my primary aim is, and it won't be "make a ton of money!"

I think that everyone deals with this, maybe they don't identify it for what it is, it's still there. There is a void in all of us that needs to be filled with our unique primary aim.

I've had success after many years of looking.
The answers came for me by.

Getting away from everything for a while and just relaxing.

Next I read the book "Now Discover Your Strengths"

Lastly we are built to serve others. Find something you can get excited in and help others.

Hope this helps.

Leo

Yes, I struggled finding my Primary Aim. When I began working on identifying my Primary Aim, it did not jump out at me. I worried. Why was this not self-evident to me? Was I without any purpose, goal or intent in my life?

That an answer is not readily apparent, does not mean you are stupid, insensitive or devoid of feeling or purpose. You just have not thought this way before. (I never had a course in school that ever asked a question like that). Again, I guessing, but I do not think the answers will not come to you through hard thought.

The answer came to me when I stopped trying hard to think of an answer. Frustrated by the question, my mind began to wander into day dreaming and random thought.

I was thinking about my early life with my family and I realized that the aspect of my parents and adults I admired most, was their volunteer service in politics, social organizatons or religous institutions.

I suggest you think back to your early life and look for values or actions their you remember admiring. What was it about the people you liked? Did you have any local heros or strong positive influencers? Did you have a favorite comic book hero, a favorite story?

So my Primary Aim is: to be of service. And the purpose of my business is to support that aim. And so I design my business to give me the time and money to do that. And that helped me move away from long days and nights of work, to normal business hours. To progress from my work as my whole life, to work to support a fulfilling personal life.